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Coles Every Argument Is Trying to Say Something: How to Discover the Emotional Needs Behind Conflicts and Stop Arguing Over and Over for the Same Reasons at Bayshore Shopping Centre in Ottawa, ON
Every Argument Is Trying to Say Something: How to Discover the Emotional Needs Behind Conflicts and Stop Arguing Over and Over for the Same Reasons in Ottawa, ON
Every Argument Is Trying to Say Something: How to Discover the Emotional Needs Behind Conflicts and Stop Arguing Over and Over for the Same Reasons in Ottawa, ON
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You argue about your cell phone.
Then, about money.
About a delay.
An unanswered message.
A forgotten task.
A seemingly small comment.
The subject changes—but the feeling in the end
always seems the same.
What if you're not arguing about dozens of different problems?
What if, behind many of these arguments, there are the same
emotional needs trying to be heard?
Behind "You never listen to me," perhaps there is:
"I need to feel that my voice matters."
Behind "You only think about yourself," perhaps there is:
"I need to feel considered."
Behind "Do whatever you want," perhaps there is:
"I'm tired of feeling that my opinion doesn't matter."
And behind the constant nagging, perhaps there's a phrase that
never managed to be uttered:
“I'm afraid of losing our connection.”
This isn't a book about learning to never argue again.
It's about learning to argue without losing sight of what truly
needs to be understood.
Because maybe you don't need better arguments.
Maybe you need to get to the conversation that lies beneath the
conversation.
If you're tired of ending an argument thinking, “That's not what I
was trying to say,” this book was written for you.
Stop arguing only about what happened.
Discover what the fight is trying to say.
Because when a need finally finds words, it may not need to keep
coming back disguised as conflict.
You argue about your cell phone.
Then, about money.
About a delay.
An unanswered message.
A forgotten task.
A seemingly small comment.
The subject changes—but the feeling in the end
always seems the same.
What if you're not arguing about dozens of different problems?
What if, behind many of these arguments, there are the same
emotional needs trying to be heard?
Behind "You never listen to me," perhaps there is:
"I need to feel that my voice matters."
Behind "You only think about yourself," perhaps there is:
"I need to feel considered."
Behind "Do whatever you want," perhaps there is:
"I'm tired of feeling that my opinion doesn't matter."
And behind the constant nagging, perhaps there's a phrase that
never managed to be uttered:
“I'm afraid of losing our connection.”
This isn't a book about learning to never argue again.
It's about learning to argue without losing sight of what truly
needs to be understood.
Because maybe you don't need better arguments.
Maybe you need to get to the conversation that lies beneath the
conversation.
If you're tired of ending an argument thinking, “That's not what I
was trying to say,” this book was written for you.
Stop arguing only about what happened.
Discover what the fight is trying to say.
Because when a need finally finds words, it may not need to keep
coming back disguised as conflict.
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