This book begans with an African American woman who is born and raised in the United States. As a Muslim woman who converted to Islam in her early twenties while in college she struggles with her Identity while trying to hold on to her youth. Her relationships, children, and second marriage goes against all that was taught to her in childhood. Dealing with all forms of abuse from the early years into her adult years, she yields accepting that it is fate. With the death of her grandmother, the stronghold of the family, and friends closest to her she learns that life and happiness does not have to be compromised. She learns that the paths taken affect herself as well as her children. Can she find her innerself along the way? Those closet to Nicole she finds strength in? She learns that she must love herself first before she can discover love from another. Religion and a Polygamist marriage are the most conflicting factors in her life. What is the starting point of the hard lesson learned in her life? Will Nicole find the demons that haunt her growth as a free independent woman? Can Nicole balance her religious convictions in her life or will it tear apart?